The Window….
August 2022
Before anyone says anything, let me begin by saying I’m a work in progress. One of my last sentences in the previous post was to be present to what you are doing. This would be a continuation on that thought. The things I do for the F3 Sandhills Pax to make a life lesson stick! This continues the theme about being where your feet are. The Window is a manifestation (reminder?) of presence in being…present.
For those who like the rugged yet accessible outdoors with fewer people, the North Unit of the Theodore Roosevelt National Park (TRNP) is hard to beat. Sure, the North Unit is a bit off the beaten path alongside ND Highway 85. There are many beautiful views in TRNP, but perhaps none are better than the view from the shelter at River Bend Overlook. Built by the Civilian Conservation Corps circa 1937, this stone structure stands on the edge of a butte, providing a dramatic view of the Little Missouri River valley below.
Now to the main focus of today’s post.
Windows. They raise up, move sideways, flip out, I’ve even seen a few that pivot. They let the light in, provide a view to the outer world or into inner spaces…some say into our souls. An old mentor of mine had a phrase he’d oft say, “It’s all a hologram.” The meaning behind that, as I understand it, is if my life is crazy right now I’m probably a bit crazy. Or, if things are peaceful and humming then odds are my inner being is at peace. Think on that a moment. What’s your external world telling you about your inner world?
When you and the M are feeling a bit frazzled, harried or disconnected because you’re playing zone defense against the 2.0’s don’t you think your inner you is also harried and disconnected? Have you switched from being the dad you know you can be to running the house like a newly minted lieutenant or worse yet a corporal? (neither are good)
All that said, my run in, literally, with windows was my most recent hologram. In a previous segment I discussed my being harried and a trailer hitch. This time it didn’t result in possible stiches.
As we were in an old CCC camp in the North Unit of the TRNP we flipped open all the windows on our tiny trailer to catch any wind that blew across the great northern plains as it was getting hot in late August. The windows, now fully open, are much like an Osprey’s talons and poised to catch anything that may raise up to their gasp at 5′ 11” off the ground.
— Images of the trailer to get an idea where the windows are
Your Humble Correspondent (YHC) exits the trailer, turns left, walks AROUND the hitch, turns left again and WHACK! Into an open window. As I shake it off I move towards my goal of getting chairs and the outdoor tent (the living room) out from under the aft storage compartment. My eyes trained on the handle of the compartment like it was My Precious or something.
Four, yes four, steps later…Schwack, my forehead meets another flung open window. “What the hell?” I mutter aloud “you were the one who opened those windows not five minutes ago!” As the cute prairie dogs chortled at me I plowed ahead. Determined to do something nice for my M…which by the way, hadn’t asked for any of this to be done. I get the living room set up in a beautiful settling overlooking the Little Missouri River, the backdrop of the rugged northern Badlands behind it and God’s majesty all around.
Proudly I open the screen door, which slides open and has no talons to catch my throbbing forehead, and announce, “Got the living room all set up!” My M gives me a smile and gracious thank you. I smile that smile we all have when we think we’ve done something really good and slide the screen door closed. I decide to go enjoy the living room so I step down and to the right – Ka-Pow! Right into another open window and cutting my forehead open, just slightly. As I stagger backwards, shake it off, I openly laugh and then curse my mentor, “F you Bob Duggan.” Yes, it is all a hologram. Mine was showing me a busy outside projecting a do-do-do state of mind and an uncertain inside.
Since then I’ve allowed myself to take my time, be un-busy, be ok with knowing that there is something to do and I can do it in a few minutes. I don’t have to DO IT ALL RIGHT NOW. Oh sure, I have my moments still of Git-R-Dun. I’m new at this slow and steady, so I give myself a little grace.
As for the windows, I give them a WIDE berth!
What’s your hologram telling you about your soul, your be-ing, your life?
Aye!